I made a snowman...

 
I made a snowman...
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Things can get out of hand pretty quickly in these times.
What a morning...

8:00 I made a snowman.

8:10 A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn't make a snow woman.

8:15 I made a snow woman.

8:17 The nanny of the neighbours complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest.

8:20 The gay couple living nearby grumbled that it could have been two snowmen instead.

8:25 The vegans at No. 12 complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures with.

8:28 I am being called a racist because the snow couple is white.

8:31 The Muslim man across the road wants the snow woman to wear a headscarf.

8:40 Someone calls the cops who show up to see what's going on.

8:42 I am told that the broomstick of the snowman needs to be removed because it could be used as a deadly weapon. Things get worse after I mutter : "Yeah, if it's up your a***"

8:52 My phone is seized and thoroughly checked while I am blindfolded and flown to the police station in a helicopter.

9:00 I'm on the news as a suspected terrorist bent on stirring up trouble at this sensitive time.

9:10 I am asked if I have any accomplices.

9:29 ISIS just claimed responsibility...

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