An 85-year-old man was having his annual health check, and the doctor asked him for a sperm sample. The doctor gave him a small glass jar with a lid, and said, "Bring this jar home and bring it back with a specimen tomorrow."
The next day the 85-year-old shows up at the clinic and returns the jar to the doctor, but it is as empty as it was when the old man got it the previous day.
Surprised the doctor looks at the empty jar and asks the man to explain what has happened, or not happened.
The old man is a little embarrassed, and says to the doctor:
"Well, Doctor ... It's like this ... First I tried with my right hand, but it was impossible. So I tried with my left hand, but could not do it. Then I got my wife to try, first with her right hand, then with her left hand, but she couldn't get it up either. She even tried with her mouth, first with her dentures in, then without them, but it went nowhere. We also called over the neighbor, Agnes, who tried too, first with both hands, then with her left hand, and then with her right hand, but no go. She tried with her mouth too, and she is a lot younger than my wife, but still there were no reaction. She also has the strongest thighs, but to no avail. We simply could not get it up, so finally we just gave up."
The doctor was shocked, and asked, "You asked your neighbor?"
The old man replied, "Yes, but none of us could get the lid off the jar. It's completely stuck.
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7000 protest Germany's asylum policy
More than 7,000 opponents of Germany's policy towards asylum seekers marched in the city of Dresden on Monday evening. Five hundred police officers were deployed to control the march, which drew a counter-demonstration by around 1,000 people.